Thursday, March 24, 2011

Happy 100!

I'd like to take a moment and pat myself on the back.

This is my 100th post!
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I'm so stinking proud of myself.  I really wasn't sure if I would actually be able to write every night in my blog.  I know that I've missed a couple of days, but...   I'm just glad that I didn't beat myself up over it and quit.

I've learned so much over the past several months. 

First I can't help now but to try to see the good in everything.  I still get frustrated and mad a certain situations, but then I take a step back and remember all the things that are going right with my life, instead of dwelling on what's not.

I also feel more and more of a connection to my ancestors.  I find myself leaning on them.  With Doc being gone so much, especially with him working night shift right now, I do feel alone a lot.  When I feel down, or alone I think about the faith and strength of those who came before me, and I lean on their strength.  I know that their blood is in me, and that I can be strong like they were. 

I've also found that I'm a much more patient Mother.  I yell less.  I notice their little smiles and funny jokes and individual personalities more.  They are all so unique and special.  They are all healthy and cute... like their Daddy.  They all have strong minds and are very independent, and although that proves to be hard for me to deal with sometimes, I hope that if I can teach them correctly now, then I know that they will be strong enough to overcome their own trials or temptations in life.  ... after all... if they have the strength of mind to say "NO" to me, then surely they will say "NO" to drugs and things like that someday... right?

Finally I'm learning more about myself.  I'm finding that I have strength that I didn't know I had.  I'm excited to see me fulfilling a commitment that I made to myself.  I'm pretty darn good at making sure that I do everything I say I will for other people, but when it comes to myself... I tend to do the bare minimums, and if I'm feeling tired, I often don't even do that.  I always put myself last... and seeing how writing in this blog is the very last thing I do at the end of the day, I guess I am still putting myself last... but to me writing down my thoughts and feelings, and lessons learned and reliving wonderful memories is the absolute best way to end the day... so in that way, though I'm prolonging my bed time... I do feel like I'm doing myself a great favor by taking the time to write.

You should try it.  If you don't already, try writing in a blog, or journal, or diary.  Looking back and re-reading things that have happened teaches you so much.  It's so interesting looking back through the pages of a journal over the stressful times, or times when big decisions were going to be made, you often feel like you are walking blindly through those times... but when you look back on it, and read how the days and weeks and months play out, you can often see the hand of the Lord guiding you along the way... though at the time you can't see Him there. 

I find that if I ever want to know what the Lord would have me do I read the scriptures... if I want to see His hand in my life, I read my journals.

On that note, today I'm dancing because I've kept a promise.  I kept a promise to myself to write in this blog everyday and find the good in life.  And like Pollyanna (from the movie... not my sister) said, "If you look for the good in life, you will surely find it"... or something like that.  :-)

So, here's to my new favorite number!



At least for today. 

3 comments:

  1. Good for you! So glad you have realized that you have unknown strengths inside you, after all it's in your genes. I do think that making the time for things that you love will make you a better Mom. Just the simple act of writing things down allows us to see our daily life clearly. Congratulations on 100 great posts sweetie!

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  2. I might not always comment but I do read your blog all the time..I find I come here to see how you are doing....you have a lot going on keeping everything together and you do a great job....congrats on your 100th!

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  3. What a GREAT accomplishment! I have really enjoyed reading your posts as they are so unlifting and insightful and you have such a gift for expressing your thoughts and feelings. Congratulations!!!

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